My blog. Not yours.

It was a mess. It was a whirling mess.

2011-12-03T14:08:00.004+08:00

Sounds of clattering of utensils can be heard as diners were enjoying every moment of the sumptuous lunch buffet. White tables and chairs were sunk into the sand for stability.

The breeze was gentle and welcoming. The sun was friendly during the alfresco lunch my friends and I were enjoying.

"Let me go!"

All of us had our head turned to the other table.

"Ahhhh!"

The agitated lady shrieked and ran all the way down to the waters. The sand scattered across that table and people were frantically chasing her. She jumped into the friendly wave and kept going further into the sea.

"Sandy!" One of her male friend shouted as he sprinted across the shore and into the waters.

Sandy's few of her other friends followed suit. With all their might, they finally pulled the stubborn and bawling Sandy out of the waters.

"Why!" Sandy screamed and teared in agony.

All her friends could do is just to calm her down. The breathless Sandy slowly lifted her head to look up to her worried friends. As she slowly turned her head, she looked towards my direction. Her red and swollen eyes pierced through my soul. It seemed as though we connected by that instant.

Her damp hair was all over her face. Her male friend gently wiped her hair away and held her close. Our eyes still fixed onto each other and Sandy broke the eye contact as she was being carried away into the indoors.

"Geez, wonder what is wrong with her eyh!" Commented one of my friend at my table.

"Just someone who do not know how to treasure her life!" Another responded.

All of us did not take the incident into our hearts and continued with our widespread feast.

After the lunch, we rested in the resort, had a massage and did a little shopping. By then, it was late afternoon. I excused myself from my group as I had been yearning to spend some time with myself.

I promised to meet them at the beach-side dining area where we had our lunch. Trotting down to the beach, I was greeted with the sound of the wave and chirping of birds. The strong and cooling wind was embracing through my hair. The smell of the wind revitalized my soul. The warmth of the sun softly absorbed into my skin. Glimmers from the sun was reflected from the calm water.

"Ahhh. What a magnificent day to be at the beach!" Smiling to myself.

Wriggling my toes into the silky sand, my arms stretched out horizontally and I let out a huge sigh of relieve. I found myself smiling and feeling rather delighted to have myself this wonderful vacation off from reality.

Strolling along the shore, my feet stepped into the waters.

"Eww, seaweed!" I thought in disgust.

Lifting my chin up to peer further out to the sea, there were two boats being anchored to the harbor. The weather was perfect, as though the sun was in an extremely good mood or was dozing off.

"Time!"

I checked my watch and it was about time to meet my friends. Skipping through the velvet sand, I made my way to the alfresco dining area.

Upon reaching, my friends were sharing their table with another stranger.

"Great."

Personally, I would prefer to have our own space to fully appreciate the time to bond together. Walking towards my friends, I was looking intensely at the stranger's back view.

"It's about time, Eliza. Come on, get yourself a drink!"

Faintly smiling to my friend, I sat beside the stranger and asked for the waiter to have my drinks ordered.

Sandy.

She is the stranger beside me. Now she seemed rested. However, she look extremely troubled. Sandy had a pint of beer in front of her which was not even close to finishing. I looked over to her and gave a polite smile. The waiter noted my drink down and I proceeded to chat with my friends.

"Don't you have anything to ask me?"

I was interrupted by that question. I turned my head towards Sandy and she was looking intensely at me, expecting an answer.

"I... I'm sorry?" It was all that I could respond.

"Don't you have anything to find out about me? Or about life?"

"What do you mean? Why would I have anything to ask you?"

Sandy looked away with a sneer to her face. She looked down on her beer and stared blankly at it. I could not be bothered with her and I turned away.

"Don't you have anything to worry about? Like bills to pay? Huh?!"

My eyebrows frowned. Looking at Sandy with great confusion, "Of course I have bills to pay. Of course I have financial difficulties to resolve. But why would I want to think about all these when I am on a vacation?"

Sandy seemed dumbfounded. As she opened her mouth to rebut whatever I said, screams from all around jolted us from our seat.

"WAVE!"

"Tsunami!"

My eyes looked towards the sea in disbelief. The wave was huge however, it is definitely not a tsunami. It was about two meters high and it was raging towards our direction. Sprouting up from our seats, we panicked and frantically stumbled through the silky sand, away from the shore.

I felt heavier. My dress felt heavier. The next thing I realized, I was submerged fully into the water.

The silence in the water was deafening.

Struggling to look around, it was nothing but all blue. The beauty of the ocean engulfed me entirely. The calmness within the depth which I am sinking into brought peace into my heart.

Oxygen.

My lungs need oxygen, or rather, air!

Getting myself together, I swam upwards. The shimmers that the water soaked up from the sun was like a glimmer of hope for my survival. I must get up there.

My lungs are burning, my chest was about the explode. Every desperate opportunity I got as I gasped for air when my head emerged from the choppy waters, the next wave overwhelmed me.

As much as I love the water, I still require air to survive. The furious wave did not stand to give anyone a chance.

Every veins in my lungs are shouting out for survival. I gasped and opened my eyes. I clasped my hands and felt a soft cotton cloth. My heart was bashing against my rip cage.

"Thank God"

Taking my time to fathom the reality, I got up and rested my back against the wall beside my bed. How amazing can dreams be to mash reality and imagination together. Before I got to bed the previous night, I was worrying about the additional bills I have on my shoulders, however I kept reminding myself not to be too swarmed by all these happenings.

Sandy was me. I was arguing with myself in that dream. Sandy was me worrying non-stop. Me being in that dream was just being the typical me, to hide my problems and enjoying other things as much as I can. Me in that dream just want to relax and have a time off from reality, however, Sandy have to be there to bug me. HAHA! I am such a pro-dream analyzer uh!

Why not try to take one step at a time rather than worrying so many things in the future.

Worrying does not help in resolving any problems. Positivism and a clear mind to work things out, does.

Such Unfairness

2011-11-16T23:47:00.002+08:00

Now I know why am I getting headaches so frequently and a delayed period. *hehe*

It's due to fucking STRESS.

11:50PM

"Seriously, can talk about it some other days de ma. I am rushing my project."

"You think your project more important than my problems?" Said the man who contributed to create me to this life.

Well, I shut-ted the fuck up.

"You don't want to talk about it ah? You think you know everything ah? You are the Da Jie leh."

I still shut-ted the fuck up.

"Your projects more important la." He finally stormed off after naggings and words of manipulations.

I continued rushing to complete my 1000 words article which I am barely reaching it. However, now I am having headache attacks and I cannot concentrate anymore.

And thus, the reason why I have a weekly affair with tearing. At least that is the only thing that can soothe me a little, at times like this . =)

All's Well

2011-11-09T23:51:00.003+08:00

What I have learnt so far in my life is... Whatever I planned how my future will be, is not going to happen.

Instead, there would be twists here and there which somehow made my life even more interesting to deal with. Not that I am proud of having some of those twists though.

The battle will not stop till the day I stop breathing.

Soul's exhausted. Mind's maxed out.

But heart's still beating. Blood's still pumpin'.

You still got to live. You are still going to face your obstacles. Just deal with it or be super sonic and dash through to crash all barriers which are obstructing your way!

Droplets

2011-11-01T16:36:00.003+08:00

Broken. Heart break. Heart ache. Affair. Third-party. Money. Bills. Loans. Lawyer. Legal aid. Assignments. Work. Onsite. Set up. Packing. Rent. Tenants. Salary. Uncertainty. Shampoo. House. Due dates. Court. Judge. Chores. Exams. Projects. Vendors. Jobs. Cough. Wart. Sleep. Dream. Grieve. Detached. Reluctance. Mistake. Brave. Veil. Appointments. Rejecting. Rejected. Dejected.

Ejaculated?

Haha, the fug.

The world does not only revolve around me.

Office Meltdown

2011-10-06T10:10:00.004+08:00

I glared at my co-workers and jolted the chair backwards while standing up. Grabbing my laptop and tossed it onto the ground with intense impact filled with fury. With all my might, wiping off whatever it is on my desk to topple all over the carpeted floor.

"Eliza! St.... Stop!" Shrieked my manager.

Gaining the immense adrenaline rush, I lifted my brown wooden desk and trashed it against the wall which resulted in a huge dent to the weak partition.

"Now, that's the shit I was looking for."

Stomping towards the Brother printer, yielding it off and allow the plugs to follow suit, I hurled towards the window which was smashed badly, causing the printer to fall one-storey down.

Snapping back to reality, tears were already filled to the brim of my eyes and I had to get out of the office - quick.

Whatever I pictured awhile ago is just a depiction of how overwhelmed I am in my personal life that I need some sort of "release" from the entire episode.

Initially I wanted to go on and on about how life is short and how you should chase after your dreams and all. On a second thought, everyone already know all these. It is just to our choosing whether we want to make things happen or not. Whether are we willing or brave enough to step out of your comfort zone.

Continue praying and may the holy spirit guide you through your daily life.

Or rather, cry all you want, after so, pick up your courage, stand strong and move on as how you have survived your life on Earth since birth.

So There I Was...

2011-08-17T10:33:00.005+08:00

Nervously rubbing the surface of my cross necklace with my thumb and index finger, I exhaled in and out, mentally preparing to absorb the response which are coming my way.

"You might have to be baptised at another church or else, have to go through another year of RCIA be to baptised in this church."

My heart sank.

I know I am ready for this. I have made preparations and amendments in my life to be ready to be baptised and be a faithful follower of God.

The Sunday classes which I attended during my childhood was like the first step to be in contact with God.

Yes, I know I stopped during my teenage years.

I answered to God's calling to attend RCIA after an extremely low point which I was experiencing in my life. I was lost and felt hopeless. No one could help me then. I had myself to blame.

Bit by bit, I improved myself as a person in various aspects of my personality and character. I know it. My mother knows it. My boyfriend commented it as well.

"Oh. Erm..." Was all that could come out from me.

Mustering every point of strength I had, "Would there be any arrangement being able to be made for my baptism, separately?"

"There are no individual baptism. It is mostly in a group. Unless there are a few of those who could not make it for the Special Mass Baptism as well, but no guarantee. But do not worry first. We have to wait for the new priest to come in then we will discuss with him about your situation."

Ah, the new priest.

"He will look through your attendance and we will talk with him, don't you worry. Most importantly, do pray more. We will also pray for you."

"Thank you."

For some reason, I would not prefer to be baptised in another church. I had bonded with my current church. Baptism is a celebration. How can I share my celebration with anyone in another church when I know absolutely no one?

This is not being anti-social, mind you.

I know we all are God's children when it comes to Christianity.

Take a school's graduation for example.

Graduating in your own school with your friends and lecturers are such a bliss and an unexplainable emotional journey. They are the people whom you had struggled with through projects. They are the people whom you shared the bond with.

They will cheer for you, as people who understands you as a person, a friend.

I believe that I will not have that kind of experience if I graduate with a different faculty, even though I will be getting the same certificate. That immense feeling of achievement will not be there.

All I have to do now is to pray and allow God's will to be done. If I will have to go through another year of RCIA, I will go through it. No matter what it takes, I will persevere till the end.

Given this chance, I do hope whatever struggles you are going through right now in your life, do stay strong and face it. Everything will be fine and good things will come your way, if you have faith and hope. =)

When I'm Feeling Happy

2011-08-10T10:00:00.012+08:00

Sounds of girls' giggling could be heard and the atmosphere was light hearted. Soft, bright and warm rays from the sun cast down onto our skin and the cooling wind brushed through our hair.

"La la la la la la la"

That, is the song, my secondary school friends and I were laughing about. Teasingly, I chuckled at one of my girlfriend for not knowing the song.

"You don't know this song? La la la la la la la.."

A simple song with absolutely no meaning but it made all of us joyful and tickled. Seated on the ground where all of us used to sit in the school's courtyard, we were chattering away until the sound of the shrieking microphone caught our attention. Apparently, we are watching a school's performance.

An adorable little boy walked up to the stage and started performing his dance - hip-hop style! We were amazed and were blabbering such a dear the little star was.

"La la la la la la la". And we all sang the song again, embracing our precious time together, cherishing every single perfect moment we can.

Then, a sudden black out.

Total silence.

Slowly and forcefully opening my eyes, I was laying on my back on something cushioned - my bed.

Stretching my arms upwards and erupting a long, satisfying yawn. As my mind absorbed reality bit by bit, I then realized what a cheerful dream I had. Turning my head towards the window, I thought what a bright and pleasant day to begin with.

Twisting my upper back to grab my phone on my side table, I switched it on to check on the time.

8:30 AM

I gasped and allowed my body to jerk up. Supposedly, I have to start work at 9am. Enough said.

Springing out of my bed, I dashed to the wash room to get myself washed up. Frantically brushing my teeth, I still have time to think how to get to work in the least amount of time ever.

Dad's car! He is off to vacation for more than a week or so. BINGO! Dad's car, that is.

Being all squeaky clean, I sprinted across the living room and found the car key on the dining table. On the way, my dog, Marley thought that I am playing with her and she kept bumping into me.

"Go away!"

With a firm grip, I grabbed onto the key however, I realised, "Where is the car remote control?!"

Unwilling to give up, I rushed to my mother's room and asked for it hastily. To my horror oh the absolute horror, "Elicia drove the car to work, I thought you said you do not need the car?"

My mind was filled with all types of profanities that ever exist in this universe. "Calm down, calm down!"

Hurriedly, I dialled the number to my sister's mobile and do not ask me why I asked the most foolish question ever, "You drove the car to work ah?!" Obviously, right?

Knowingly, I would hear the obvious answer which I still stubbornly hoped I would hear the opposite, "That the car is in the carpark."

I sped off to my room to start on my make-up.

"Oh crap, oh crap!"

Picking up my phone, I messaged my colleague that I will be late for work and thankfully she was okay with it. Then again, I could not stand myself being very late for work, it would not be morally right. Adding on, to be one hour late? That is like sixty minutes of lateness!

After it seems like eons have passed, I finally completed my make up and packed my handbag, which it's basically stuffing loads of shits in it.

Now, it's time to scout for a taxi to save me the shit load of trouble to troop down to the train station and all the morning peak hour craziness.

As I jogged under the scorching merciless sun, there were no signs of any cabs at all. It seemed as though I am in the "no-cab-wants-to-pick-people-up" zone. The explicit curses started streaming into my mind and I imagined a humongous chunk of brick tumbled down to block it off. *pats my back*

The universe have left me no choice but to brisk down to the train station to get me to my work place. I had to pause and pause like as though people started sprouting out of nowhere to intentionally obstruct my way.

I swear to you the background music started playing Ludacris' song:
Move bitch, get out the way!
Get out the way bitch, get out the way!

It kept goin' on until I found myself inside the train and allowed myself to cool down. *Phew*

Time was ticking. I peered around the train and got annoyed at how can everyone seemed so calm when I am late for work? *Flips hair*

I know I made no sense. Geez, I'm mega late!

"Ding dong!"

Great, my stop.

Now Ludacris starts rappin' again as I zipped through the crowd.
Move bitch, get out the way!
Get out the way bitch, get out the way!

Eventually, I got out of the chaotic subway and skipped down to my office building.

Out of nowhere, once again, my way was obstructed by this mother and her young little adorable daughter. Awww~ Cuteness! BUT I'VE NO TIME FOR THIS!

GET OUT THE WAY!

Just then, the girl turned around and gave me the most angelic smile I have ever seen in my life. My heart melted and I felt terrible for my previous thought. Please kill me.

The final destination - my cooling office. Ahhh~ Heaved a sigh of relief.

Usually, I would try to see a situation from a positive perspective that even though I am late, my colleagues and boss were being absolutely understanding about it.

Even though I am late, at least I got the chance to wake up this day and thank God for it.

But seriously, fml. *wipes perspiration*

Temperature

2011-06-25T19:00:00.002+08:00

Everyone is a poet when they are in love. The air will seem to smell sweeter. Your soul will seem to be able to feel the warmth even when it's snowing cold. Your heart will seem to be intoxicated with overwhelming happiness and peace.

How magnificent is this feeling that God gave this precious gift to each and everyone of us. We ought to appreciate the simplest things in life, as it is in those simple things, that we will feel pure happiness, without corruption, ulterior motives or hatred. Just pure child-like happiness.

It is indeed understood that no one said life is ever easy. Monetary issues will set in. Hurdles to overcome. Any sort of relationship(s) will be broken. People come and go.

When the time comes for anyone to feel dejected in love, not any simple or flowery words will be able to elaborate or portray the pain he/she is going through.

Getting hurt is inevitable. Even though the only person whom is your happiness, will hurt you. Sometimes we might take one another for granted. At times, we might be too demanding or unreasonable.

People will then ask, why pursue a relationship when it does not help you to be a better person? Most importantly, why be with a person when you are not able to be who you really are? Unable to share your dreams and goals in life?

Maybe it is just love and stupidity.

I learnt it through the hard way.

I have learnt that love is a relationship between two people and two people only.

I learnt that problems which is able to be dealt with by ourselves, we should face it together, hand in hand.

The more you complain about your partner to your friends, the more the problem isn't going to resolved by itself. Furthermore, how can you expect your family and friends to have a good impression on your partner when all you showered onto them are your partner's negative traits?

When any problems arises in my relationship, I have learnt only to confide with true friends whom will truly understand from a mutual perspective. Or if not, just bear with it on my own.

I believe everyone is an angel in their own way. Problems are just a way to learn more about ourselves, our partner and our ability to resolve it. Problems appears and vanishes. Everyone handles each and every problem differently in their own way. At times, we may handle incorrectly but that does not define us. We all are still learning to live this life in our own way.

Give everyone a chance and not deem him/her as someone "bad" based on what you hear.

God's every single creation of us have His reasons for it.

He wants us to experience sadness so we will know what is happiness.

He wants us to experience hatred so we will know what is love.

He wants us to experience loss of any relationship, so we will know how to cherish.

He wants us to experience stress, so we will know how to relax.

He wants us to experience rejection so we know how to give everyone else a chance.

Be a poet in your own way. Sprinkle words of positivity in your life. Write it with your favorite coloured pen. Allow God to guide your strokes as you journey through the lines of every page.

Scatter the Cluster of...

2011-06-16T11:10:00.003+08:00

Not ideal. Take me as. Dime of respect.

If so, why are we still here?

Love.

Comfort Zone.

Verbally.

Unhealthy.

Great.

Must Watch Films

2011-05-10T10:31:00.006+08:00

~~Source Code (2011)~~
~~Thor (2011)~~
~~Priest (2011)~~
~~Pirates of the Caribbean:On Stranger Tides (2011)~~
~~The Hangover Part II (2011)~~
Fast Five (2011)
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (2011)
Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011)
Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)
A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas (2011)
Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011)
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (2011)
[REC] Genesis (2012)
[REC] Apocalypse (2012?)
Marvel's The Avengers (2012)
Clash of the Titans 2 (2012)
Madagascar 3 (2012)
Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012)
The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)
The Bourne Legacy (2012)
The Expendables 2 (2012)
Resident Evil 5 (2012) and WTF means I have one year to watch Resident Evil 4.

Cooling Day

2011-05-06T14:02:00.003+08:00

Today is Singapore's Cooling Day for tomorrow's General Elections Polling Day.

The sun shows no mercy like as if Mister Sun is casting millions of raging fiery flaming missiles down our backs with a smug on his face.

Not at all a cooling day.

After nine days of campaigning from all of the political parties, it made me realize one clear and unmistakable strategy the opposition tends to adopt during their rally speeches.

MONEY. *ka-ching*

"Why are the ministers' getting $15,000 a month?"

Upon that question is being asked or made, the audience will jeer along with it.

The opposition consistently uses money to instill antagonism into Singaporeans. In fabricating their mindset that the party is able to apprehend the true lives of Singaporeans.

It feels like they understand that what we want is all related to money. If the government spent billions on something, we would get all upset. "Why not help the poor and the needy with that amount instead?" We would all question.

With the oppositions emphasizing on how they can make a better Singapore, to help Singaporeans and not leave anyone behind - already won the hearts of many.

With the PAP emphasizing that they are willing to transform to a better government, to provide more accountability within the parliament - already assures the unease for many as well.

All I can say about our dear Singapore is... Do not solely get your news feed from the local news. It is just all cover ups. Though, it has improved throughout the years, the media still is biased.

OPEN UP your eyes, Singaporeans, especially those 35 years and above (yes, that includes all the Ah Ma and Ah Peks). Time has changed and politics methods will inevitably have to tweak according to the society.

Mindset changes with time.

=============

Is money, really everything in life?

I do not get it.

I always believe in this: Air, Water & Sun - The most important things in life are free.

Stop and smell the flower but do not get stung by the bee.

A Ray Of Light

2011-05-01T12:39:00.004+08:00

I wonder and I really wonder - when will the results be made known to me? The result of my application status to start my part-time degree, that is.

The immense feeling of waiting day after day, is slowly eating me alive.

Then again, the time and energy to worry everyday isn't worth it - I know. *sigh* I just have to keep waiting till end of May 2011. =)

=============

At times I can say the most stupidest thing that I want to shoot myself on the spot. Sometimes, it is during work when that moment occurred. How silly of me.

Realizing that you have to prove your capability to do various kind of job scope is stressful.

In Singapore, money is an inevitable problem we all are facing. Which is why, we all have to work harder and harder.

Until to the extend that some might forget how to enjoy life. I would not want that to happen. You should not want that as well. =)

The White

2011-02-21T13:10:00.002+08:00

It is strongly discouraged to blog publically about your boss or your company's management political issues. Why so?!

The virtual world bookmarks your footstep prints all over. That said, it's the ever-so-poweful IP Address, ISP net etc. I am no IT person though.

Anyway, I was feeling rather lousy awhile back and yes, this is regarding my work. I know it seems like it is my fault however, I also know that I had tried my very best to avoid this situation - and this, to me, matters.

Not forgetting the aftermath which I felt remorseful about.

Silliness & Procrastinating

2011-02-13T02:32:00.002+08:00

It is already 2.30am in the morning and I shall share with you a silly moment I had gone through recently.

I had to make a call to an Irish company (in Ireland, of course) and I decided to call them at about 4pm.

Me: "Hello, may I speak to Ms. A?"
Operator: "She would only be in at 9am"
Me: "What time is it over there?"
O: "It is ten past eight."
Me: "OH! She should be in by now, right?!"
O: "No. She will be in at 9am!"
Me: "So, may I speak with Ms. A?"
O: Sighed. "I will connect you to her phone, but she will be in at 9am."

Obviously, the call did not go through. I was just confused as I thought she meant, it was like 10am already.

==========

Seriously, I am ageing by the minute and I have not started my bachelor studies - yet! I cannot afford to quit my job to study full time, which was why I looked towards the part time study courses.

I could not wait to apply the part time degree by this February for their July 2011's intake though. As I estimated the duration of the course to be like 4.5 years. I had seen people working in the day and going classes in the night - it was exhausting for them. I was wondering how can they manage it!

In turn, I will be one of them soon.

D'you enjoy life? I do. Who doesn't!?

If I keep procrastinating to start achieving my goals or push it aside, I am just going to suffer later when it comes to a point that I have achieved none every single year that I procrastinate.

People age. I will age. The longer you delay, the older you will get. Which in turn, more workload will be dumped upon you and you would not have the energy to go through studying. Why not start young and complete it once and for all?

That way, you can focus more on your working life and build or enhance your career prospects!

=)

Insanity

2010-12-11T14:43:00.003+08:00

There are three things which I am interested in achieving in life or rather before I meet my creator.

1. Be a humanities teacher.
Not necessarily I have to teach in government schools. Private schools will do fine (if I were even in their "considering" list). Knowing that I do not have any qualification at the moment, I still feel like trying out.

Humanities is a subject that not everyone likes to teach. Reason being, it is not a popular subject. I don't know. Go figure.

2. Be a photography journalist.
Not many knows that I love photography. It is because, I do not have the financial resources to get myself a decent DSLR (Digital Single-Lens Reflex) camera. Nonetheless, I believe in the perspective of how a picture is being taken. Not necessarily a pro-DSLR is needed. It is the skill, baby.

Secretly, I would like to travel to countries such as (North Korea, Afghanistan, etc) to capture unique moments of its citizens living there. Or anything to show the world how these fellow human beings needs help or what they are going through.

Plainly, I just want people around the world to be more aware of what is really going on out there. Especially Singaporeans - most of them are living in their little cozy nests (yes, like me as well. Sigh.).

3. Events Project Manager / Producer in the Media Industry.
Since my polytechnic years, I had a small slice of what the media industry is like. It's hectic, tedious & really need a lot of "links" as well as resources.

Perhaps I would like to produce a film, get a story out in motion pictures. I had manage a video production team back in school & I enjoyed it. I know it's kinda amateur though, but the main thing is, I enjoyed it. Who enjoys their school projects?

Or if not, managing entertainment events. I love planning and executing events ever since my polytechnic days.

==========

Basically, I need working experience, which is why I am working now. However, if graduates started working in an industry which have no help in their future career path, why stay at that job? Just to fill your stomach?

I know this might not sound like so much of a sense to everyone, but to dreadfully work for money is absolutely terrible compared to working because it is your passion.

Go figure. By the time you hit your thirties or forties or fifties, you'll know. You will know you do not have much time to waste your life away doing something you dread. You will want to pursue the things which you do not wish to regret if you did not pursue.

Which is why, midlife crisis exist.

Smiles

2010-08-27T14:32:00.002+08:00

The start of my career. Currently, I am not doing anything big, however, I do not mind starting from scratch - which is what I am doing now.

I believe my acheivements will be acheived, not now, not later, but in time.

=)

==========

On a side note, most acquaintances are either having babies or getting married. I am in my early twenties already and I keep telling myself it is time to start planning to settle down within the next few years. However, the person to plan with, isn't ready at all...?

=(

Achievements

2010-07-07T17:47:00.000+08:00

Throughout my life, I have not much achievements. The most significant achievement, is being able to have you as my special one, sharing every moment in my life, being together - in love.

However, somehow... I just could not entirely capture your heart. It seemed that you have someone (in future) else out there where your heart is meant to be. It seemed that I am not the one for you.I want to be selfish, to keep you by my side, to continue loving you and be loved. However, I know you are suffering in silence, which ached my heart.

Being selfish would not be the solution to capture your heart and love - I know.

I'm perturbed.